Finally, he picked one with class

How jealous are you girls??

And can I suntan on that bed in Waikiki?

Bergdorf Blondes

Roxy is correct. This book is adorable. I've picked up two clever new phrases:

SHAME ATTACK

and

She's as happy as a rapper in an escalade with blacked out windows.

I'm only halfway thru the book, but it's fun. Did you know, Rox, that she has a second book? It's called the Debutante Divorcee.

Weather Update

The weather forecast for today:

Chicago: Low 32, High 39.

Omaha: Low 33, High 49.

Honolulu: Low 74, High 85!!

It's fucking SNOWING!!

i have no additional comments.

Loving the Link

http://www.celebrityprayerlist.com/

THIS MAKES ME FEEL BETTER!!

it's denise richards on the beach. and she and i are built the same except that my boobs are bigger!!

see ya on waikiki!

Time to check out the library, ladies ...

I just finished listening to this AUDIO book.

It's read by the co-author, with a British accent.

It's hilarious. and charming. and is guaranteed to make you smile.

I promise. And I almost never make promises.

Swimsuit Season....for Roxy

Dear Roxy,

i tried to find a picture of me in a bathing suit to prove that a tankini is the way for me to go, but i had no luck. i'd like to thank you all for adhering to the "only photograph from boob up" rule. i did find a rather unflattering picture of myself from our ahem class in vegas, but it was too horrible to post, even with black bars covering most of my body. :)

no worries, however, as i have several sarongs that can be strategically tied while in hawaii.

FIVE WEEKS, BABY!!

hugs and kisses,

summer

Who Dies?

First Miranda indicated that someone dies in the SITC movie. Now Carrie says in my Entertainment Weekly that something really, really bad happens in the first act.

I got money on Big biting the Big one.

Discuss......

how many points for the deed??

just a quick update...i have thoroughly examined and checked all of the boy's parts and they work EXTREMELY, EXTREMELY well...O - O - M - G....that's right, that would be 2 of the big O's mixed in and around several smaller o's....incredible...intense...passionate...mmmmmm...hmmmm...i'm pretty much hooked... ;)

Givin' KC another chance....

anybody want to go out in KC on saturday night?

YOU'RE FIRED!

Kate's "exclusive" agency for film and tv was fired over the weekend after they set her up to play a disadvantaged child who receives a bible and a tshirt in a church sponsored movie.

clearly they don't know her mother.

this summer's latest fresh mix CD is being compiled NOW!! any requests for beach music? dance music? just drivin' my car in the sun music?

please note that augustana and counting crows are already in attendance. this CD will be titled:

(is the anticipation building?)

(can you stand it?)

(only 6 weeks until summer.....)

the summer of love SEVEN: luau edition.

ALOOOOOO-HA!

over the hump!

i made it over the hump!! hurray for fruits and veggies and not killing sorority sisters.

AND happy hump day to all of you!

i'm stuck

as you know, i'm going to hawaii with my BFF roxy at the end of may. you are all intimately familiar with the trauma of bathing suit season.

my diet is stuck. i haven't lost a pound in the last 2 weeks. it's completely unacceptable. so i am forcing it by eating nothing but fruits, veggies, and low fat dairy for the next 5 days or until i become such an unbelievable bitch that someone buys me a slice of pepperoni pizza or a cheeseburger or something.

i even exercised yesterday. hard, labor intensive, actual exercise. i technically didn't sweat because i was swimming laps, but i was pretty sure i was going to have a heart attack mid stream. and yes, i did look fat in my bathing suit.

some fake tan would probably help......

something happier

what roxy and i will be looking at in 45 days

so sad kitty

mushu went to the vet on saturday because i noticed more bumps on her tummy. her cancer appears to be in her lymph nodes and other locations on her chest and stomach. dr. andy gives her 2-6 months. so i am devastated. my poor kitty is only 5 years old. stupid breeder is to blame by allowing her to have kittens then spaying her after her 1st birthday.

in celebration of her last few months, she will be eating rich, fatty, completely unhealthy wet cat food as often as she wants.

and she can play on the computer way past her bed time.....

i'm auditioning

ok, okay, OKAY!

i AM that superficial. those pictures are just too horrid.

in honor of his new movie, new episodes of house, and his deep, dark, beautiful eyes, i will (at least for tonight) replace mr. piven with kal penn. my list was lacking diversity anyway. and we all know i like diversity!

this one's way worse....

obviously, i am not so superficial as to dump my soul mate over how he looks eating.

but it's tempting.......

ew.

Another futile attempt to change her mind ...

Summer's one and only.

Her true love.

Her ... big, fat, hairy man beast.

Enjoy, Ladies.

the boy...

geez! ok - in response to the House of Lust posting from sweet lil o' sydney here is an update...

have seen the boy...almost every day for the past week...he's addictive - i admit it! he's HOT...extremely HOT...he's SEXY...extremely SEXY...he's SENSUAL...in the picking me up, lets make out on the kitchen counter and have a kiss that lasts 20 minutes (yes one kiss - 20 minutes) type of guy....yummy...he's SWEET, yet rugged at the same time...looks damn fine in a baseball hat and ripped jeans and drives a kick ass truck- he's soooo my type of guy....he treats me like gold and i don't quite know what to do with that...so girlz i am rolling with it and am going to see what happens...who knows...maybe he can change my cynical ways....

Rock of Love vs. House of Lust

Harley is totally holding out on us, girlz. While she was once headed south for warmer climate... I think she is headed south on a... I mean with a particular man. Things are starting to heat up and I see no reports or postings whatsoever. Shame, shame, I know your name!!!

Her home is becoming the HOUSE of LUST!

Bret Michaels, eat your heart out...

Things That Made Me Happy This Weekend

It was a FABULOUS weekend. Probably because it was 60-70 degrees and I haven't seen temperatures like that since October in Vegas. And not in Chicago since September!! So I actually was in a decent mood. Here are the top 5 things that made me smile:



This book is a GREAT beach read. It's about a woman's attempts to murder her ex-boyfriend/business partner. Funny, satisfying, slightly cartoonish.




This movie is good. The thing that put it over the edge for me: Dan and his family go to the annual beach weekend at his parent's house. His brothers are all there with their kids. One of the kids is Chinese. And they don't mention it at all. She's just there with all the rest.



Kate learned how to ride her 2 wheeler. Granted, she is TERRIBLE at it, but great strides were made.



I'm going to buy this bag at Target. How cute is this? It's kind of clear plastic, much cuter in person, and it's for the beach, Rox, which leads me to number 5......



53 days until this:



Tickets still available (except on ATA).......

When Spring Break Is Winter Break

stop me if you've heard this one before, but i'm so friggin' sick of cold i could cry. thanks, kc, for rolling out the 45 degrees for me!

so i have some pictures. they mostly suck. apparently i wore the same white jean jacket the entire time i was there. oh wait. i did. because i was so COLD. i did have cute tops on underneath, but you'll just have to take my word for it because i was layered up like an eskimo. and i'm 20 pounds lighter than you think. again, those layers really play tricks on you.

first of all, please note that i have used some fun colors for little black bars. i'm not sure if the sunflower girls require anonomity or not. probably not, however, because they are far sweeter than the rest of us. A.B. has never even been to vegas. i mean REALLY.

S.J.F brought her own dessert to the restaurant, which is ballsy, but so is she.

ps. margarita mama's at legends in kc sucks on a whole new level of sucks. i'm going to go ahead and post their recipe for salsa:

open one can crushed tomatoes. dump into styro bowl.

C.T. was popping pills left and right. i hope it clears up whatever terrible VD she has. ;) kidding! probably.



so i took the summer of love tour on the road next to visit the big O. it was also cold there. roxy has a new house and it's nice as can be. i hope that she memorizes her address soon because she gave me the wrong one. but she's not afraid of color and her entire house is decorated like a texas saloon, which undoubtedly makes her feel right at home. :) with zebra trim, natch.

we had a fabulous time doing what we always do in omaha. eating and drinking, mostly drinking. we also went to see comedian rob little at funny bones. rob wants me and no, not like how i always say men want me when they really don't. the girls were in full effect friday night. you all know how expressive roxy's eyes are and i wish you could see her expression in the picture below. it can best be summed up as "no, i don't want to be in your f-ing picture and i'd like to get the hell out of here as quickly as possible, please. i'm humoring you, summer, because you are my dearest friend, but your obsession with comedy must stop."

next stop: tengo sed at the glamorous new P&L district in downtown kc. yeah.....only there was a national cheer championship (perhaps more annoying than a bachelorette party?) AND an arena football game both downtown. we could have parked and walked a couple of miles, but i had on girl shoes so you know how well that would have gone over.

so we hit dos hombres in the river market. their salsa is actually good. and harley, syd, and i could actually speak to one another without screaming. downside: no stripper poles.

here is a picture of harley looking at a picture of a penis on her cell phone. harley REFUSED to share her picture which is why it is not on this blog. i am pretty certain that the owner of said penis wouldn't mind it being published, so she's just being selfish.

and here's syd and me. don't we look like responsible adults? i hate that syd's hair always looks so nice and she said she wasn't even using the right shampoo. bitch.

next up on the tour: honolulu. tickets are still available for this hot hot event. highlights include lavish meals, free beds at the holiday inn, and OCEAN.